Content warnings: non-explicit self harm and bulimia
by Axel-Nathaniel Rose
Gilded crowns first place medals golden child
Blood drips like honey down her arms, his thighs
Don’t see the shame; how a rotting corpse thrives
Violet-dyed children traverse through the wilde
Guilt-filled cavities overflow with praise
Works half to-death; no witness to their cries
Time refines fifteen year old lovers’ lies
Lights out, time’s up, in guilt and love they pray
Prays: ‘if I’m good enough will they love me?
Will they forgive my sin? Can I be clean?
Can I give in, can I live out this pride?’
This skill they command: to purge ‘til they’re free
This golden child shines but it goes unseen
how they fight the sweet call of suicide.
Axel has been writing since the tender age of five, his debut novel The Evle King dedicated to his brother’s tyranny over the household armchair. His writing has since expanded to short stories, poetry, and oration, with particular focus on queer narratives, mental illness and social media.