Category: Satire
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Tharunka editor writes more emails than articles
An anonymous source (allegedly a Tharunka editor) has told Tharunka they’ve had to wait more than a month to get paid below the minimum wage after logging their invoice to Arc @ UNSW Ltd. According to the source, they’ve spent more than 50 unpaid hours resending the same email to Arc to remind them that…
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First-year wants to know where the free plants are
“I PROMISE I’LL TAKE CARE OF IT”: wide-eyed young psychology student Emma Brandt only had one place to go amid the endless stalls of O-Week. “I don’t remember what it (the stall) was called,” she explained, “but they have sunflowers this year and they’re so cute. “You get nothing like this back home in Walcha.” …
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College students rejoice as Goldstein dining hall serves cooked chicken
By Jack Nivison Tharunka reported exclusively at the scene, where the tearful rejoicing of dozens of college students echoed throughout the hall. The change comes after several weeks of reported sub-par meals, and the announcement that the Goldstein Dining Hall – “Dino” to the locals – will be contractually separated from its current catering service…
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Should there be more Grindr ads in election campaigns?
With the Liberal Party thoroughly rawdogged up the Brisbane River by a group of young men and older women, all parties are now considering the power of homoerotic advertising on the campaign trail.
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I’m Sold
by Rosalie Lambert Welcome! we’re hungry for you. This store has everything you could ever want, anything in the whole wide world, anything you can reasonably afford! If you want something new, something pristine or something untouched. There are no foul fingerprint smudges, not a shade of rust. No history, no loose threads to pull.…
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Ian Jacobs flees to Scotland
By Nishant Pandav (@NPaNium) During the early hours of Monday 16th March, Professor Ian Jacobs, Vice Chancellor of UNSW was seen rushing into the international terminal of Sydney Airport. One of the SRC members camping in the bushes outside the Chancellery spotted Ian leaving the campus in a security van. The SRC member reported that…