Satire

By Stephen Brannon Today the Australian Research Council announced that it would further fund the UNSW Quantum Computing lab in order to store its immense amount of cash. Quantum Computing Centre leader, Professor Simmons, was unsurprised to hear that their research facility had been granted funding to outfit the state …

By Elle Bodeep Honi Soit wants to play dirty with their What’s On? We’re in. You’ll need stitches for this comedy stab Congrats on having 25 people attending your comedy night. But le joke in on le you because we’ve already had two sold out comedy gigs this semester with …

By Stephen Brannon Students were shocked this morning to discover that finally, after years of blissfully occupying a law library desk, the doors had been barred shut by angry law students. Late last night, a band of furious law students chained all entrances to the multi-story library, before piling chairs …

By Stephen Brannon Jane Wilson is a young medicine student, with a keen interest in endocrinology, and great potential in the medical field. However, she’s begun a strange ritual since the Roundhouse’s closure. Every Tuesday afternoon, she leans, longingly, against the chain link fence surrounding the once bustling bar. “It’s …

By Stephen Brannon The University of New South Wales community was shocked as Vice-Chancellor Ian Jacobs announced his ambitious plan for enhancing the financial and educational viability of the university. “In order to deliver fantastic quality of education, and deliver our ambitious social justice platform, it has become necessary to …

Illustration by Amy Ge Dear Agony Ibis,   All of my friends went on amazing holidays to exotic and expensive locations over the break, and I’m very jealous. How can I fit in with all the new friends I’m planning on making, especially given my Insta game has been so …