Category: Satire

  • An Appreciation of Peacocks: UNSW Conservatives and Socialist Alternative find common ground

    An Appreciation of Peacocks: UNSW Conservatives and Socialist Alternative find common ground

    By Belis Beattie A shocking recent discovery, made simultaneously by both UNSW Conservatives and the Socialist Alternative, has revealed that peacocks are actually like, really cool. This realisation comes after one of the said peacock species was found at UNSW’s upper campus on the Library Lawn. Reports indicate that the peacock was promptly removed as it…

  • UNSW Students Celebrate 5 Year Anniversary of Light Rail Construction

    UNSW Students Celebrate 5 Year Anniversary of Light Rail Construction

    By Jimmy Wiseau   Thousands of UNSW students have gathered to celebrate, swap well-wishes, and have even taken to Moodle forums to express their joy at the recent five-year anniversary since the CBD South East Light Rail (CSELR) was approved for construction. Students of the university were reportedly impressed and overcome with emotion at the…

  • How I Overcame Heartbreak In Three Simple Steps

    How I Overcame Heartbreak In Three Simple Steps

    By Hamish Duncan   I used to think I had it all. A good job, high marks at uni, and a wonderful relationship with a beautiful girl. The world was my oyster. But one day my girl said those four dreaded words: We need to talk. I was shocked, but I knew what was coming.…

  • Women Call on Men to do Less

    Women Call on Men to do Less

      By Tasarla Harman   On Tuesday 15 August, women released a statement urging men to “just leave everything alone”. Women collectively decided that men no longer need to participate in housework or offer emotional support and, most importantly, they must leave politics alone.   The United Nation’s “Facts and figures: Leadership and Political Participation”…

  • Agony Ibis – INTERNET Issue

    Agony Ibis – INTERNET Issue

      By Sarah Hort   CW: Reference to paedophilia and child sexual abuse   Dear Agony Ibis,   I find myself in an ethical quandary. My employees have come to expect beanbags, gourmet lunches provided five days a week, bicycles and an office so extensive it’s a “campus”. This shit ain’t cheap. To bankroll these…

  • The Metadata’s Alright

    The Metadata’s Alright

      By Annice Savill   To my fellow university students,   I know we are young and complaining is kind of our thing, but it’s time to rein it in. I get it, you’ve heard about these new metadata retention laws, and you’re terrified. Not just terrified, you’re livid. You’ve read a thinkpiece or two…